Why you?

Today, I have an argument with one of my friend.............again.

And he brought up the subject about the guy that I used to like, and still like.... even though he did unforgivable things. I tried to hate the guy who was perfect to me, but I always ended up forgiving him..

Jerry is who I called him...

It's been 2 years and I need to move on. And my friend wanted me to move on too, but he did not know that it's really hard for me to do so, even though Jerry was never mine.. He was never mine...

Imagine.....
Someone who you think he's the one,
Someone who you finally put all your trust onto,
Someone who you put all your heart to,
Someone of your dream,
Someone you know was perfect,
Someone whose words were so real,
Betrayed you.....
Hated you.....
And wanted to do nothing with you....
Just gone like that.........

It was last few weeks, he told me that he know the jerk, Jerry. And he told me things that I never told him, like the name Jerry exist, cause Jerry isn't his name at all...
I kept asked him how did he know Jerry...but he never wanted to tell. I appreciate that, but my curiosity....

Then, finally, during the argument just now, he told me that he and Jerry are cousins...

That is depressing... It was harder to breathe after that...

We, then, just wanna settle those arguments.. and he apologised for this mess..

I forgave anyone easily...

But, I'm sorry, It's harder to forgive him now than usual.....
I wanna apologise too, but my anger and depression......It's harder to forgive now....

If these shits kept on repeating, I won't be able to accept my fate and move on...

STOP DROWNING ME!!